14 Proven Ways To Create Your Own Happiness :-)

14 Proven Ways To Create Your Own Happiness :-)

You are responsible for your own happiness.

That’s what our marriage counselor told my wife and me a few days before we jumped the broom. At the time, I didn’t get it. I thought as a couple, we were supposed to complete each other and therefore make each other happy. It didn’t fully register until a few years into our marriage that no matter how well intentioned my wife or I were, we could not “change” each other and therefore our ability to “make” each other happy was futile. Sure, I could tell a joke and make her laugh or she could surprise me with tickets to the game and light up my face with a smile but ultimately those things were not happiness, they were kind acts with kind responses. Happiness is much greater, it’s much deeper, and it can only be self-directed.

If you are struggling with your own happiness, the following are 14 things you must know:

 

1) Know The Ingredients Of Happiness

There are three keys to happiness. You must have all:

a) Pleasure (stuff that feels good in the moment – go anywhere you want with that statement…lol)

b) Meaning (belief/religion/philosophy)

c) Engagement (interaction with family & friends)

 

2) Visit The Double G (Gold’s Gym & God’s House)

Exercise and religion both make us happy and it’s because they provide small boosts to well-being on a regular basis. Although, do them separately. I once tried working out at my church and it was a miserable experience 🙂

 

3) Understand Rich People Are Not Happier

Don’t think Diddy is truly any happier than you. Well, on second thought, Diddy might be but know the super-wealthy aren’t that much happier than the average person. Studies show once you make 75K a year, more money doesn’t make you all that much happier.

 

4) Buy More Experiences And Fewer Material Goods

This means more putt-putt golf and vacations. Fewer cars and less new TV’s. In a survey from the Journal of Consumer Psychology, people were asked which of two purchases made them happier, nearly 60% of respondents reported that they had derived greater happiness from their experiential purchase, while only 31% reported greater happiness from their material purchase.

 

5) Be A Giver 

It’s the first of the month, you just got paid, and you’re thinking making it rain on yourself is the quickest route to happiness. WRONG! Several studies show that those that give or what’s called buy “prosocially” (ex: day-to-day activities that include friends and family) are happier than those that simply spend on personal items.

 

6) Drop The Mean Muggers In Your Crew

Research by Nicholas Christakis, a social scientist and internist at Harvard, states “the reality is straightforward: our friends strongly shape our behavior. We imagine ourselves as individuals, responsible for our own choices and emotions, but that sense of independence is a romantic myth. There is no wall between people.” So this means happier friends, happier you! No Mean Muggin!

 

7) Don’t Move To Russia

I found this to be fascinating, here are the happiest and least happy places to live in the world – Russia is not the best look.

 

8) Set Ambitious Goals

People who set conservative goals have a harder time achieving satisfaction than those who set ambitious goals. This is according to a new study in the Journal of Consumer Research.

 

9) Know Happiness Can Come In A Few Seconds

Thinking about the absence of a positive event from your life allows you to better appreciate the presence of that positive event in your life. Try it!

 

10) Think Faster

The Psychology of Science reports that we experience an independent increase in positive mood when we think fast rather than slow. Therefore, I’m going to need everyone to read this entire blog post again, but do it in 30 seconds!

 

11) Take Vacations

Jamaica, on the beach, Red Stripe in one hand, favorite book in the other. Not much else needed to explain here.

 

12) Tell Someone “Thank You”

“Thank you” is one of the most powerful word combinations. Use it often but use it genuinely. The result is a sense of overwhelming gratitude.

 

13) Spend More Time With Family & Friends

Happiness expert Daniel Gilbert prophetically stated in an interview ”We are happy when we have family, we are happy when we have friends and almost all the other things we think make us happy are actually just ways of getting more family and friends.”

 

14) Do This Gratitude Exercise…

Take a few minutes to write down 5 things you’re grateful for each week. Do this for 10 weeks. Studies show those who follow this simple exercise exhibit higher levels of happiness.

 

 

 

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About Paul C. Brunson
Mentor, Entrepreneur, & Television Host. My goal is to help you live your best life. I’m the world’s most influential matchmaker, founded and exited three businesses, host two television shows, spent nearly a decade working directly for a billionaire, and share my experiences by mentoring through Knowledge Share
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Desiree M. Mondesir
Guest

Ha! #10 makes me laugh! 🙂 Great post Paul!

Paul Carrick Brunson
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Paul Carrick Brunson

🙂

Biiond Liza Ellen
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Biiond Liza Ellen

I had no intention to move to Russia. What do you think about TX?

Paul Carrick Brunson
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Paul Carrick Brunson

lol. Well, my brother and my sister-in-law are moving to TX, I have many friends there too. Several cities seem to be amazing (Austin in particular).

Namie Bimba
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Namie Bimba

Great post! Read about #4 somewhere else too–spending more money on “experiences” vs. material goods = greater happiness and found this part of #6 poignant, insightful and just plain profound, “…There is no wall between people!” It’s so important to surround yourself with positive, healthy examples of human beings!

Paul Carrick Brunson
Guest
Paul Carrick Brunson

Thanks for reading it sis! I truly love that quote, as well.

Ella Rucker
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Ella Rucker

Thank you! This is right in line with the meditation challenge set forth by Oprah and Deepak I JUST experienced. You are definitely correct about friends, experiences, and gratitude. Much appreciated.

Paul Carrick Brunson
Guest
Paul Carrick Brunson

How was it Ella? This morning was the first session, correct?

Ella Rucker
Guest
Ella Rucker

Yes, today is STILL the first day if you want to join. It is good. Why? I thought it was self-guided, but when you asked I thought maybe I’d missed something. Went to the site and found the audio. So I had a miraculous experience in being more present since you asked, I worked out after my first meditation, and am meditating for the second time today. 🙂

Paul Carrick Brunson
Guest
Paul Carrick Brunson

I’ll check it out, thanks!

Dawn Stewart
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Dawn Stewart

Paul i love this post so much i am going to share with all my friends

Paul Carrick Brunson
Guest
Paul Carrick Brunson

Thanks for reading and sharing it Dawn!

Starkey
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Starkey

I absolutely loved this post! My sorority sister and I were just talking about #6 because the most negative person can really put a damper on your mood sometimes. I’ve realized that sometimes the smallest things in life brings the most happiness in my life.

Paul Carrick Brunson
Guest
Paul Carrick Brunson

Truth!

Rinice
Guest
Rinice

Great post! I especially like number 4. That’s been the credo that I’ve adopted most recently. I’m going to pass this along to my friends! Thanks!

Paul Carrick Brunson
Guest
Paul Carrick Brunson

Thanks for reading and sharing it!

Theresa
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Theresa

“NoMeanMugging” Great analogy. Those words took me back to the lyrics of a song The Rapper “E40” wrote that says “I’m mean mugging but I feel great” and I thought to myself that’s an oxymoron, how can someone truly be happy but it’s never evident in their facial expressions. Thumbs up for this post! 🙂

Paul Carrick Brunson
Guest
Paul Carrick Brunson

Thumbs up on the E40 quote 🙂

Natasha D. Harrison
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Natasha D. Harrison

I Love #4 & #11! I’m definitely in the 57%!! I tell people all the time, I like shoes and purses, but I prefer to spend my money on vacations! Just returned from a week in Hawaii……Bliss:-) Great post for a #nomeanmugginmonday!

Paul Carrick Brunson
Guest
Paul Carrick Brunson

Welcome back Natasha!

DSweetOne
Guest
DSweetOne

I’m putting this on my vision board!

Nozipho
Guest
Nozipho

Thank you Paul I followed the gratitude advice, nd I always feel good, knowing that I do not need to be rich to be grateful, God gives me more each time I acknowledge and thank him for the blessing everyday

Pam
Guest

Awesome list. Gratitude puts you in a different frame of mind totally. I released my wants and decided to focus on what I am thankful for. I would like to add one thing to your list though Paul, good music. Now technically that could fall under #1a, but I had to separate it because it just has to be by it’s self. Listening to Lalah Hathaway “Something” right now JAMMING!! Makes me happy!

JonesLBrown
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JonesLBrown

Yes!!!!

Traci Ferguson
Guest
Traci Ferguson

love, love, love this!!!

Kadian Blidgen
Guest
Kadian Blidgen

Great article! That Jamaica shout out!! Repost ☺

Ashley Hodges
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Ashley Hodges

Now #3 I want to at least make the 75k lol whew so far away.

Alison Newman
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Alison Newman

#JamaicaLove way up!!! lol

Stephanie Mentz Breakman
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Stephanie Mentz Breakman

It’s harder when you have to co parent with a person that doesn’t respect you.

Arlene Bowen
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Arlene Bowen

Dat Red Sripe would a do mi well right now…

Jackie O'Nappy
Guest
Jackie O'Nappy

I know you’re a red stripe guy but…… This!!!!

Naa Kwamah Nartey
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Naa Kwamah Nartey

I expected to see help and service

NatashaBecky
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NatashaBecky

Amazing testimony on  how to save your relationship and marriage from divorce or broke up, Dr Frank Ojo saved my marriage by bringing my husband back home today..! My name is Natasha Becky. I’m happily married to a lovely and caring husband with two kids. A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my husband .so terrible that he took the case to court for a divorce.he said that he never wanted to stay with me again,and that he didn’t love me anymore.So he packed out of the house and made me and my children… Read more »