Category Archives: Dating

10 Most Outrageous Myths About Men We All Believe

10 Most Outrageous Myths About Men We All Believe

Before clients of my agency begin the matchmaking phase, we first put them through several weeks of intensive coaching. Our focus during this pre-match time is to share effective dating strategies, review recent research, and most importantly, dispel myths! Over the years, I’ve heard just about everything, and I mean everythang! The following are the top 10 myths our female clients believed to be truths.

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5 Important Tips If You’re Considering Christian Online Dating

In my 22+ career as matchmaking professional and online dating expert, I’ve had the privilege of interviewing over 60,000 singles immersed in conversation about their dating and love lives. I take the time to learn about each person and focus specifically on what’s been working or NOT working in the area of their personal relationships which brought them to seeking “professional” help. I explore all of the avenues they have tried to meet people and get into the details of their past failed relationships to gain deeper insight about their experiences in order to create an effective solution.

My best guess is that 90% of those I speak with have “tried” online dating (even if it was just to create a profile to browse around) while the remaining 10% are either too afraid or simply not interested in ever trying online dating. Their fear is based on third party stories and beliefs created from the warnings of caring friends and family members who think online dating is somehow bad. I have found that Christian singles seem to be very reserved about trying online dating and quite often share with me,”God is going to deliver my partner. God will give me a sure sign of help.”

As I listen to their fears, I instantly think to myself, perhaps this is WHY we are having the conversation in the first place; at this time and in this moment.

I firmly believe in my ability as a professional coach and matchmaking expert, my work with singles will have a positive and lasting impact to their love life. Anything is possible for you and your life if you’re willing to put in the effort and do the WORK necessary to achieve happiness, love and the results you desire.

I’m here to shed some light about online dating for Christian singles and to share some important tips for Christians who are considering online dating as part of their dating strategy…

Christian Online Dating

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9 Biggest Problems With Dating Today & How To Solve Them

I’ve been a professional matchmaker for six years and in just that time I’ve seen a significant shift in how people date around the world. In most countries, every category related to dating, from public opinion about it, to average length of time couples see each other, to satisfaction, have plummeted. We’re living in a time I label as “alarming” and fully expect if there is not an immediate shift in how we date, our communities will fall apart. After all, marriage is the cornerstone of society and dating is the cornerstone of marriage.  

Below, are the 9 biggest problems with dating today and my thoughts on how to solve them.

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8 Quick Ways To Detect A Non-Committal Man or Woman

When genuinely searching for a committed partner (leading to marriage), there is nothing worse than wasting your time with someone who is simply looking for quick sex, casual dating, or just a long-term hang out buddy. By my estimate, 80% or more of daters are not looking for anything serious and although I’m an advocate for “date practicing”, I’m not a proponent of giving your time or resources to a dead end partner.

If you find yourself debating whether the person you’re “dating” is non-committal, here are 8 quick ways to determine if he/she has long-term intentions:

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What Do Men (Really) Like?!: 6 Things Men of Substance Value Most

“Troy, I just don’t get it! What do men like?”

I could sense the frustration in her voice as she asked the question. She was just like a woman you may know – one who is frustrated with dating. She is exhausted from the games, tired of the lack of consistency, and worn out from men wanting to give her everything sexual but without commitment!

To her, the men people said were supposed to be so “simple” have turned into physics, accounting, and statistics all at the same time.

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Well, the truth is that I can’t tell you what men like because men like different things, but I can tell you (based on my thousands of conversations) 6 things men of substance VALUE most!

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Know Your Roles: Laymates, Playmates & Soulmates

Know Your Roles: Laymates, Playmates & Soulmates

Throughout the many conversations I’ve had with friends and family surrounding relationships, one trend was quite evident – it’s difficult to recognize the role someone’s playing in your life until far too late.

We usually meet someone, date for a brief or extended period of time (which could include marriage), and then after the relationship has run its proverbial course, we reflect on it to discover the warnings we discarded and the fatal flaws we dismissed.

Based on a snapshot of the dating world, here are the 3 roles I’ve seen most prevalently: Laymates, Playmates, and Soulmates.

Now, let’s discuss the differences between the three…

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Do You Suffer From “Type Hype?”: How To (Really) Find Your Match

Do You Suffer From “Type Hype?”: How To (Really) Find Your Match

Remember the popular, satirical YouTube video called “(Authentic) Black Marriage Negotiations”? Well, if not, to refresh your memory: the wildly popular video featured a computer generated image of a Black woman listing all the things she wanted in a man.


The clip was loathed by the many, but there were some who liked the video. It gained my attention because it tapped into what has been a big issue in my work.

[inlinetweet prefix=”#TypeHype |” tweeter=”@paulcbrunson” suffix=””]People are often unable to tell values from wants.[/inlinetweet] Often, these people suffer from “Type Hype.” But, what’s the fix?

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4 Reasons Why a Love Without “Scandal” Is Healthier

4 Reasons Why a Love Without “Scandal” Is Healthier

Unless you’ve lived under a rock for the last few years, you know about hit ABC’s drama, Scandal and its constantly conflicted main character, Olivia Pope.

Olivia Pope is a self-described “fixer” – a woman who, along with her team of associates, can make just about anyone come out of the biggest controversies smelling like a rose (whether they created the problems themselves or were thrust into them by happenstance). Except, ‘Liv…as everyone affectionately calls her, just can’t seem to “fix” her own beleaguered love life. Because, well…she’s having an affair with the President of the United States.

Scandal, now a nearly ubiquitous cultural mainstay, also has us talking about the state of relationships, and if the “drama” is worth it. Should we all want a “boring,” predictable kind of love, or an exciting one, rocked with drama and “scandal” (perhaps not of the affair-having variety)? Does the choice even have to be presented in such a dichotomous way?

Well, I think there’s 4 great reasons why a love without “scandal” is healthier…

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7 Reasons Why I Hate Valentine’s Day

I’m about to write the one post you would never expect a professional matchmaker to write. So, first, let me clarify that I was actually a matchmaker. Yes, that was my “real” job and one that I loved.

This time of year is the Super Bowl of my industry – lots of events, lots of media attention, lots of new client requests. You would think I should just shut my mouth and enjoy the ride. However, I can’t…because I hate Valentine’s Day.

Hate Valentine's Day

Yes, that’s how I truly feel and let me give you the 7 reasons why…

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15 Ways To Know If You’re Dating a Man or Boy

15 Ways To Know If You’re Dating a Man or Boy

Let’s be clear: not every boy becomes a man. When dating, knowing how to distinguish between the two will save you time, energy, money and even heartache.

Here are 15 ways you can separate the men from the boys

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