12 Reasons Why Women Find Idris Elba So Irresistible (And What Men Can Learn)

12 Reasons Why Women Find Idris Elba So Irresistible (And What Men Can Learn)

Okay, I have a confession: I’m fascinated by how fascinated women are with Idris Elba. You first met Elba in 2002 when he stepped onto the blocks of Baltimore in his breakout role as Stringer Bell on HBO’s critically acclaimed show The Wire, and since then, he has become widely known as “one of the sexiest men on the planet.”

I would even go as far to say Idris has dethroned Denzel, in your hearts, claiming his title as the new King of Irresistible.

But with millions of men on the planet, how is it that one man has so many women so captivated? Better yet, why is it? Is it because he has a smooth British accent, or as my cousin would say, that “smooth dark chocolate skin?” His stare, maybe?

I’m here to tell you, you love Elba for all those reasons, and some. I’ve spent time studying him in the hopes of helping women to better identify the exact characteristics that compel them to fall for a man. I also did it for the fellas, so we can fully understand the specific attributes that equal “sexy” to a woman. The bottom line is, there are several scientific reasons why women find men irresistible and Idris possess all of them. Here’s the breakdown.

 

1) He’s Confident

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Confidence and high self-esteem are sexy, no question. In six studies from the Evolutionary Psychology journal, men with ostensibly higher levels of self-esteem were rated as more attractive and as more desirable relationship partners than those with lower levels of self-esteem.

 

2) He’s Good At His Job

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In all of his hit roles, from playing a drug lord on The Wire to a detective on the hit BBC series Luther, he always appears to be very competent at his work. Success at your job, whatever it is, conveys you have the skills to “get things done,” and an achiever means a winner.

 

3) He Has A Deep Voice and Talks Slowly

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Research that looked at U.S. presidential candidates between 1960 and 2000 found that in all eight elections, the candidate with the lower voice won the popular vote. Psychologically, we are more inclined to like men with lower-pitched and slower talking voices.

 

4) He’s Calm

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Women find men who don’t stress hotter. According to new research conducted at the University of Abertay Dundee, men with low stress levels are significantly more attractive to women than highly stressed rivals.

 

5) He Doesn’t Fidget

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When I think of fidgety, I think of Pookie from New Jack City, not Idris Elba. In fact, have you ever watched Idris in an interview? He doesn’t move much at all. No tugging at his clothing, bobbing his head or twitching his shoulders. He stays cool, cam and collected. Composed people exhibit a level of stillness, which is sometimes described as poise. They avoid extraneous, superfluous gestures such as fidgeting with their clothes, their hair, or their faces, incessantly nodding their heads, or saying “um” before sentences. Women like that.

 

6) He Has An Intense Stare

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The science behind this speaks volumes. In a study I found, subjects induced to exchange a mutual unbroken gaze for 2 minutes with a stranger of the opposite sex reported increased feelings of passionate love for each other. That unflinching eye contact will hook ’em!

 

7) Uncertainty Increases Attraction

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Yesterday, it was just announced that Idris is dating this woman, however, he’s 41 years-old and this is the first public linking to a romantic partner. So who has Idris Elba dated in the past? Hmmm, you don’t know? Neither do most of us, and that’s what you love about him. It’s the mysteriousness and uncertainty about the type of women he likes that actually makes him more compelling to all women.

 

8) He Doesn’t Smile Much

The Palazzo After Party For Sony Pictures Entertainment's "Takers"

Run a Google image search for Idris Elba, and you’ll see he rarely smiles in photos. This has really helped his cause. In a great article called “Happy Guys Finish Last” an interesting study was revealed where we see happiness is the most attractive female emotion expression, and one of the least attractive in males. So men who do more mean muggin’ actually win.

 

9) He’s A Bad Boy

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Okay, I don’t know about his off-screen persona, but on-screen, Idris predominantly plays bad boys. And yes, it is true, women who like sex prefer bad boys. According to the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy, women who are more permissive and who are willing to engage in sex are more attracted to bad boys.

 

10) He’s Moderately Muscular

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Women dig “quasi” muscular men. So in other words, being too muscular, aka Arnold in his Mr. Universe days, is not a good look. In the article “Why Is Muscularity Sexy? Tests of the Fitness Indicator Hypothesis” from Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, it showed women rate moderately muscular men as much sexier.

 

11) He Knows Who Wants Him

 Premiere Of Screen Gems' "Takers" - Arrivals

According to a report by MSNBC, the more attractive the woman was to the guy, the more likely he was to overestimate her interest in him. And it turns out; the less attractive men (who believed they were better looking than the women rated them) were more likely to think beautiful women were hot for them. But the more attractive guys tend to have a more realistic assessment.

 

12) He’s Exciting!!!

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I preach this all the time. To keep your relationship hot, you have to keep your relationship hot – which means new and exciting activities and adventures. Research shows that if partners experience excitement from other sources (such as novel and challenging activities) in a shared context, this shared experience can spark or reignite relationship passion by associating the excitement with the relationship.

 

Did I miss any traits about why he is sooooo compelling?

 

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About Paul C. Brunson
Mentor, Entrepreneur, & Television Host. My goal is to help you live your best life; in love and professionally. I’m the world’s most influential matchmaker, founded and exited three businesses, host two television shows, spent nearly a decade working directly for a billionaire, and share my experiences by mentoring and coaching thousands of people.
399 comments
omalicha 1
omalicha 1

Idris Elba is heaven. I have to listen to him and watch YouTube video of him every night before I sleep, just to have that sweet dream of both of us together.

IdrisFan
IdrisFan

This was hilarious! However, I think you've missed the most important and obvious reason: he's ruggedly handsome in a way that women find sexually appealing. Don't overthink it--Idris is foremost irresistible because...he looks so darn good!!


Cheers.

Abdulazeez Zakariya'u
Abdulazeez Zakariya'u

my best film : anything without Idris Elba perfect world : a world without Idris Elba. Lol just kidding. I love (like is a better word) the guy.. loved ( that word again) his work in ( doing a quick Google search).. yeah! "The Wire" and "Ghost Rider".. he made a very sub-par Mandela though.( :-D) guess the man isn't completely perfect after all. ooh ooh almost forgot and... last pic I saw of him he had a few grays on his beard ( how very sad brought tears to my eyes). at least we know not everything in this world is completely unfair (like aging for instance). so yes, I love grampa Elba.

Chella Bella
Chella Bella

Gloria Weidum-Nwaigwe 😍😚 OMG you remembered ✌

Lillian Thompson
Lillian Thompson

I married that guy but was too young to appreciate him!\U0001f633

Tammie Jackson
Tammie Jackson

The man is simply sexy with his deep, dark, rugged self. If there was a movie to the Gideon series by Eric Jerome Dickey he would be the perfect person.

Tammie Jackson
Tammie Jackson

What he was doing was giving you guys some great advice. And Mr. Idris Elba is SEXY

Tracy Breeden
Tracy Breeden

Here you go Natasha Frye!!!!! #GetYourBooGirl

Kaley Theis
Kaley Theis

I want him to he is just a very sexy older man! \U0001f600\U0001f60d

Amaka Charlene Imma Onah.
Amaka Charlene Imma Onah.

I think its because he seems like a regular boy next door! Like he's not trying hard to be sexy....He's not excessively built, has a regular hair cut, etc and not caught in the regular Hollywood glamour craze (rather seems not to be caught in it) that's why females relate with him....The man is Sexy though, I can't not understand you....lol...\U0001f601\U0001f601

Omega Thornton
Omega Thornton

His mannerism, the way he stares as if he's looking at only you ( the window to your soul)

IdaraO'Bonne Udo
IdaraO'Bonne Udo

I still cannot see it. He is a good-looking man no doubt, but I do not understand what all the fuss is about.

mojo
mojo

you cannot be serious ...

Christina Dabney
Christina Dabney

Umm, I don't know about anyone else but I thought he was handsome when he played Stringer Bell but the sexy began to exude when he got outta that bed in those black boxer briefs in Takers... Ooo Wee!! Lol

April Harvey
April Harvey

Never thought of him as a sex symbol! He's just another guy that has made it big in the film industry. I am more attracted to how great of an actor he is over his looks!!!

mojo
mojo

OMG - look at him again - go to a quiet place if you have to, but look at him again ...

Dawn Chérie
Dawn Chérie

You left out the fact that he's tall, which most women are attracted to. Thus making him literally tall, dark, and handsome\U0001f60a

mojo
mojo

that's what's up - he is holding from head to toe and front to back ...

Theresa Harp
Theresa Harp

You summed everything to a perfect 12 cause Yesss lord he's fine,sexy,handsome,gorgeous and the dam list goes on\U0001f61c\U0001f61c\U0001f61c

BK Chen Bo
BK Chen Bo

She's one of the reasons black men don't like black women. And she's all plastic and filler. I can't with her no talent azz.

Shawne McGruder
Shawne McGruder

#11 made me laugh, but it's true \U0001f44d\U0001f3fd

Naomi Everett
Naomi Everett

Hollie Jp Johnson I was literally about to tag you then I saw you'd commented \U0001f602

mojo
mojo

so true ...

Dina Varsani
Dina Varsani

Feisty! Yes just my boom eyes...until we meet again anyway haha!!

Vicky Feist
Vicky Feist

Just your boom eyes?? \U0001f602\U0001f602

Dina Varsani
Dina Varsani

If I ever met him I'd show him my boom eyes!

mojo
mojo

if I ever met him I'd show him a whole bunch of boom stuff ...

Shelley Thomas
Shelley Thomas

Bingo! Alpha male, humble, understated masculinity and a hint of bad boy swag. We gotta know or believe our man can provide and protect. It's primal but instinctive.

Denice Christian
Denice Christian

I've always loved him but when he used his accent in Taken that sent me. Just the way he said his sister Naomi's name \U0001f60d\U0001f60d

Vicki Dorsey
Vicki Dorsey

good read, you got it, lol! nothing like a confident man...

DK KN
DK KN

He's sexy, attractive, has nice teeth, is gainfully employed and is beautifully colored!

mojo
mojo

I wouldn't care if he was broke, he is just so damn fine money would find him regardless ...

Tamieka M. Augusta
Tamieka M. Augusta

\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602 too through! \U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602\U0001f602 I barely could focus......

Debera Stepp Theiss
Debera Stepp Theiss

I rarely comment on things like this but I thought I would weight in. I have only in the last year seen movies and what not with Idris in them. I would say I believe that you got it on all 12 points. I think one of the biggest ones is his body. Being a personal trainer that all puffed look has long since gone its way. He has a very natural and attractive well fit body. I would say over and above that one of the things that is very attractive about him is that he is very good at what he does. It is quite the skill to be able to make us believe that he is a drug lord in one venue and then a loving father of three girls in another. That is to talent and that is very sexy,

mojo
mojo

true ...

Yvonnette Brown
Yvonnette Brown

oh yea i agree with Kerri S Johnson you will need our help Paul!

Yvonnette Brown
Yvonnette Brown

lawd i agree with everyone of those omg Love me some Idris Elba

Rosemarie Roy-Wright
Rosemarie Roy-Wright

I know I any be an anomaly but I don't find him sexy at all! Shrugs shoulders. To each his own!

mojo
mojo

girl bye ... and I ain't mad at cha ...